So just a quick shout out to Karen, who just announced her move to her real – name space. I wish you all the strength and healing you can find in combining your separate pieces into one whole.
I’ve always written under a pseudonym, and I have no reason to think that will change. I have no burning reasons to keep my identity secret, but I do prefer to keep my real name and this place mostly-unconnected by google. I doubt many people would consider me a privacy advocate, but I am strongly against corporate informative asymmetry. That is, I don’t mind anyone knowing who I am or what I write, but I want to be the gatekeeper of that information, not a search engine. I firmly believe that the only way to keep something a secret is to keep it offline, and I’m not going to give away my personals for the benefit of someone else’s algorithm. I try to share enough that sponsored content is relevant, but not so much that I become de-anonymized. That there’s no way to tell if I am or not bothers me more than the marketing anonymity itself.
I’ve written here so long that “sharah” has become her own persona. If we were to meet, I’m sure you would see the part of me that is here. But she’s not all of me, and never will be. There’s no way, I think, for any single voice to represent all of a person. We cannot translate ourselves onto the screen as whole, complete beings. So you get a part here and a part there, like the blind men describing the elephant.
I’m going to segue here to a post by Danielle LaPorte: One night stands and other sacred containers not meant to be breached.
“Sometimes you cry in a stranger’s arms precisely because they are a stranger. You let your secrets be witnessed because the witnesses are outside of your every day reality.”
I came here and cried in your arms because you are all my strangers. You were witness to my pain when no one else could be. And now, inside this sacred container, we have a different relationship than we could have outside of it, one protected by the blank wall of a pseudonym.
Thank you. Thank you for standing witness, for abiding with me on this journey, for reading, for commenting, for coming back and moving forward. This space is nominally mine, but without you, it would be bare and sterile. Instead, it is filled with warmth and companionship and I am so grateful that it, and you, are here.