Make sense to anyone else? The reverb prompt today was this:
I’m sure most people would take that and start thinking about their blog, or their short story, or poem, or novel. Me? I immediately go to my dissertation.
My dissertation that has about three sentences in it.
After a year.
Why don’t I work on it? I could give you all the usual reasons: new baby, full time job, husband, house, blah blah blah. But the real reason is simple.
I don’t want to. I have been in college since
dinosaurs roamed the earth fuck, let’s see … carry the one … 1998. Jesus, 12 years. I am tired. I want to go home at night and be with my family and not think about technicaltopicthatmyadvisorhasfundingtostudy. When I do spend time working on research, I remember why I’m doing this. I enjoy it; I enjoy studying and learning, and the topic has direct application in my career. But writing and compiling and having to think about how all the moving parts work together? Exhausting.
I want to finish. I have come too damn far to quit now. But I almost wish that I had never started down this road.
So while I was putting the baby down tonight, in the dark with no distractions, I started thinking about the math involved in finishing this. One paragraph each day for 365 days = 365 paragraphs. 365 paragraphs / 4 paragraphs per page = 91ish pages. 91ish pages = almost a full dissertation. Seeing as I’m scheduled to graduate in 2012, that’s the rate I need to be writing at.
A paragraph a day. I can do that.
So henceforth, I am instituting NaDissWriYear. I am committing to writing one paragraph each day for the next 365 days. If I get more than that, whoot! But if not, at a minimum, I’ll be well on my way.