My friend is moving away. The one that we wanted to be godmother to Mini.
And I feel like breaking down.
She’s not the first friend I’ve had move away; there are others in multiple cities now. Nor is it that we’re exceedingly close – there are other girls in our circle who I talk with on a more regular basis. But she is the one who was pg with me, who lost the baby. The baby that is always, in my mind, a little boy who would have been right there with Mini. Her lost baby is my baby’s “ghost” — and she is the ghost of me. The me that would have been if we didn’t have Mini.
She is Home to me, the place where I feel comfortable, where I know how to act and react. I can read her, I know when to catch her eye or give her a hug. And I know that moving away, away from her friends and family, is going to be so hard for her. She will be moving to a new house in a new city with a new job and no one she knows around her. Who there will know when to reach out and squeeze her hand to let her know she is not alone? Who there will be Home for her?