Ho-hum

I feel like I should be whispering this, but I’m having trouble believing that I might get pg this cycle.  I don’t know if it’s because I’ve spent the last few months trying to ignore the fact that we’re trying, or that I didn’t start the met until the night I triggered, or that I don’t feel like we had good timing, or what.  It just feels … unreal that we have a chance.  Don’t get me wrong, I would LOVE to be wrong about this and see a + at the end of the month, but I don’t think it’s going to happen.  Enough so that I’m worried about next cycle because it looks like I might be out of town right when I need to be getting a CD3 ultrasound.  It’s killing me — one freaking trip in two months, and I scheduled it for when I’ll need to be here at the Dr.’s.  Yes, I counted ahead and thought that I was scheduling this trip for the second week in my cycle, but despite my skill at higher math, I obviously haven’t mastered counting to 31 yet.  And I’m pretty sure that I won’t be allowed to cycle on clomid next time without and u/s to check for cysts first.  Grrr. 

Speaking of metformin, I am apparently the girl who gets no side effects.  Well, I’ve had a little trouble sleeping the last week, but that might or might not be related.  (One of our kittens –we have two sisters that we adopted last Thanksgiving– has developed the habit of sleeping between my knees, which pins me down at night.  Normally I toss and turn all night long, so I keep waking up because I feel caught.)  I’ve been trying to incorportate more protein and fewer starches into my diet, and swap out my “white” products for whole grain on the advice of the internets.  I hope that I end up losing weight because of both the met and the diet changes, because lower carb diets have helped me lose weight in the past.  I’m also sticking to my 3x per week exercise better since Dr. Local told me that exercise alone would help lower my blood sugar, and was really helpful in conjunction with the met and diet changes.  This weekend I’m going to go break out my old Sug@rbusters diet book and refresh my memory on the glycemic index.  Remembering that I lost 8 pounds on that diet and 37 pounds on a different low-carb plan have reinforced my belief that I have issues with blood sugar and insulin, even though I haven’t heard anything back on my test results from the RE.

So overall a ho-hum kind of Friday. 

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